Hugh's Eulogy

My brother and sisters, I am so very grateful for the opportunity to share in this remembrance of my dear brother Hugh.  And, I petition an interest in your hearts that a portion of our Heavenly Father’s spirit might accompany my words – that our collective souls might be soothed; and, our shared hearts might be lifted.  I express gratitude to Hugh’s beloved companion Karen, along with her children; for the privilege of participation, and pray their souls might receive the solace Hugh would want for them.

It has been noted that our birth and death are fixed points on the stone that marks our final resting place.  We have little, if any, influence on those dates.  They are a matter of record. They occur without our awareness.  It is, however, that little dash - separating those two endpoints - that defines the life led by the graves occupant.  It is about that dash in Hugh’s life that I wish to speak today.

Following the turbulence and tragedy of a worldwide war; and, subsequent to the reunification of newly wedded hearts; Donald Charles and Arvona Erma Davis reunited to create the family they’d had the faith and courage to originate in the midst of such worldwide upheaval.  The first fruits of their endeavor culminated in what was to be the joy of their hearts – Hugh Jimmie Davis.

As with all firstborns, Hugh received the undivided attention of both parents.  Penetrating their hearts while he slumbered in their arms – the newfound, exquisite joy of offspring saturated the collective soul of these new parents.  As one of the earliest grandchildren to join the large extended families of his parents, Hugh was showered with attention from a multitude of grandparents, aunts and uncles.  For the first 2 years of his life, he, unknowingly, enjoyed center stage to a large affectionate audience.  Unbeknownst to this toddler, however, he would soon be required to share his stage with an ever widening troupe of players - for the remainder of his life.  Snatching away his limelight would be a set of twins no one expected.  And, in his own good nature, Hugh was entreated to assist mom in caring for these intruding infants.  Mom told me Hugh would keep one of his brothers from tumbling from the changing table while his mother diapered the other.  Day after day, week after week I, along with my twin brother, was protected from harm by the secure 2 year old hands of my elder brother.  Hugh had embarked on the caretaking role he would carry, in an ever widening circle of stewardship til the final months of his mortal sojourn.  Foreordained to fulfill the roles of eldest brother, eldest son, devoted Husband, Father and Grandfather; Hugh’s influence for good commenced as a toddler under the watchful training of devoted parents.

It has been said that, sometimes being a brother is even better than being a superhero.  Hugh’s lifelong devotion to the caretaking of his fellow man renders his mortal contribution as truly superior!

Hugh’s role as eldest brother incorporated unique and challenging circumstances.  As all brothers know, camaraderie between elder and younger brother is fairly automatic and deeply rewarding – despite the challenges.  This was not to be the case for Hugh.  As the elder brother to a set of twins, he was placed at the head of what psychologists call ‘the eternal triangle’.  As the three parties of such a trio rival for alliance and allegiance, imbalances naturally occur and struggles ensue.  As the outsider to the innate bond between twins, Hugh was called upon to bond with two who’d already bonded In utero.  Such a seemingly impossible undertaking was to be his lot throughout his life.  It’s been expressed that siblings are the people we practice on, the people who teach us about fairness and cooperation and kindness and caring - quite often the hard way.  As the remaining mortal member of this triumvirate, I thank my dear companions for their tenacity in wrestling with our shared challenge.  I assure my immortal brothers that their brotherly love shined (and still shines) brightly; eclipsing the shroud of our youthful training ground with the radiant glow of eternal accomplishment.  I express eternal gratitude for their triumph!  A triumph over the challenge few knew existed and still fewer comprehended.

This was not to be all however.  And, with the happy arrival of Rick, then Reed, and then Tammy the joy prevalent within the circle of siblings expanded.  Each addition was greeted with excitement as the months counted down to delivery culminating in a delightful baby to bless the house and home.  A new baby brother or even better - sister!  Accompanying such growing bliss however, was an ever expanding circle of responsibility for the eldest child.  Beyond the challenges of the twins was the increasing stewardship of little brothers and sister.  Hugh was a dutiful steward of his younger siblings.  Often called upon to referee squabbles in the absence of busy parents, Hugh attempted to preserve peace (if not life and limb) in the midst of sibling conflict.  And while no one enjoys conflict, oh how Hugh hated it!  Presiding over energetic siblings without the benefit of parental presence, Hugh would tentatively persuade where possible, direct if needed, intervene when necessary, and prevail when all else failed.  It was nice growing up with someone like Hugh – he was someone to lean on, someone to count on . . . and someone to tell on!  And tell on him we did.  Hugh, saddled with the challenge of discerning between the rights and wrongs of siblings in disagreement; expected by those same litigants to display the wisdom of Solomon (at the tender age of 12); would then be called upon to defend his judgments as parents arrived home to receive our prepared reports on his performance as Acting Parent.  Bless his heart; Hugh endured such challenge for most of his youth, all the while endeavoring to navigate the terrain of his own personal path.

Upon reflection, it is interesting to note that to the outside world we all grow old. But not to brothers and sisters. We know each other as we always were. We know each other's hearts. We share private family jokes. We remember family feuds and secrets, family griefs and joys. We live, in measure, outside the touch of time.

And while the responsibilities Hugh grew into were significant, he was frequently a frenzied flurry of fun.  Some of my earliest remembrances are of Hugh taking me and Jay to slide down a snowy slope on cardboard sleds.  He couldn’t have been more than 5 years old sharing the fun with his 3 year old brothers. I remember waiting, as a 3 year old, with anticipation to see Hugh walk up our sidewalk from kindergarten so that the day’s fun could commence.  Hugh could always be counted on as a catalyst for activity.  For example, during our elementary years Hugh assembled what is best described as a ‘coffee can cannon’ and together we spent hours explosively launching rubber balls over the roof tops of neighboring houses.  Such thunderous liftoff scattered neighborhood cats, raised a tumult of barking dogs within a quarter mile, and terrorized mid-day housewives as rubber balls, without warning, suddenly appeared bouncing in their yards.  From flying kites til dark in a moonlit autumn sky to fishing at the city pond under a summer’s shower, ours was a storied childhood, led by an enthusiastic architect of delight.  From winter sledding to summer bb gun battles; from spring time sleep outs to autumn’s Halloween haunt; from city pool swimming to Saturday movie matinee’s ours was a childhood to remember.  And Hugh would lead the way. 

A favorite family story is told of when we boys would be in a neighborhood field shooting our bows and arrows.  Naturally, as time passed, we’d look for something to shoot at other than targets or distant marks.  On one occasion, Hugh, being prone to early boredom, chose to shoot his arrow directly over his head.  As the arrow disappeared into the blue sky, he turned to us all and said, “Don’t move or it’ll hit you!”  Terrified, we could only glance skyward as the arrow reached apex beyond our view and plummeted toward our locale.  Psychologically, one does not gaze skyward due to the fear that doing so somehow temps fate to draw the returning arrow directly to your eye.  Brief squints are all that courage allows, hoping all the while that none will receive the returning dart – most of all you!  As the arrow suddenly twanged in the nearby ground to the great relief of all, Hugh launched another directly overhead accompanied by the same directive, “Don’t move or it’ll hit you!”  Shocked at this development and now familiar with its concerns, we all exclaimed our alarm to Hugh, all the while with one eye skyward.  (Parenthetically, I’m now confident that Hugh was placing just a tiny bit of arc on that arrow that we could not discern.  Or at least that’s what I now tell myself.)  This behavior continued for four or five arrows, pinging and plunking vertically in nearby ground as gasps of relief expelled from held breaths.  Our feet rooted to the ground, our minds whirling in confused panic – we stood protesting his continued release of vertical dread.  Although I can’t be certain, I believe I observed a glint of glee in Hugh’s eye as he released these silent shafts of terror.  Finally, someone bolted from the field and the others followed.  Turning, all we could see was a grinning Hugh standing in the midst of vertically planted arrows.  Now such a story would be alarming on its face.  However, to our collective chagrin this happened on several other occasions suggesting that Hugh’s younger brothers just were not capable of learning.

Another of my favorite stories displays the multilayered comradeship of brothers at play.  Near our home, several vacant lots were allowed to overgrow with trees and grass.  Adjacent to this was a pond. Hugh and I and Jay were playing in the trees of this area one day when Hugh got the idea that it might be fun to chop down one of the trees.  Further, he suggested that such fun would be enhanced if one of us was in the tree.  Now these trees were not small.  Some were 30 or 40 feet tall.  And I could not be convinced that occupancy of the tree enhanced our experience.  However, Jay was persuaded.  Climbing into the canopy of the tree 20 or 30 feet up, we commenced to chop at the tree’s base.  Jay was quite calm, all the while dictating his feelings from treetop altitude.  As the tree began to weaken and sway, the tenor of Jay’s dictation began to include trepidation at his former decision.  Receiving selfishly applied reinforcement from us below, Jay returned to his perch as we applied the final blows.  The tree fell with its perched occupant shrieking through his entire arc to terra firma.  Landing in a bed of tall grass, Jay was not hurt.  However, as we extricated him from the limbs and leaves of the felled tree, he excitedly expressed dismay at the experience.  After a short reprieve, to my amazement Hugh began to persuade Jay that he’d not ‘done it right’ and that we’d need to perform the ‘experiment’ again.  To my further amazement, Jay, after protest, was finally persuaded into the treetop of an adjacent tree.  A second felled tree and we all decided that the fun was over - most of all Jay.  Together we would wend our way home, hatchet in hand, pondering our separate perceptions of the day’s play.  We were a trio – and enjoyed the comradeship of shared adventure.  Some, unfortunately, may never understand the delicate joys of this kind of sibling abuse.

As Hugh grew beyond childhood, his endless energy and ready spirit drew many friends and his popularity in school settings swelled.  In hindsight, however, Hugh remained quite grounded despite his school wide popularity.  Hugh never swayed from his church responsibilities and always accompanied the family on frequent weekend fishing trips to local reservoirs.  Hugh’s energy found outlets in sports as the center for the basketball team in junior high and place kicker on the Clearfield High School Varsity squad.  Unfortunately, Hugh would also experience disappointment as we discovered his lifelong heart murmur that curtailed strenuous athletic participation.  Oh how I envied Hugh’s graceful jump shot as we’d play for hours at a neighbor’s basketball hoop.  Eventually, Hugh’s attention was drawn away from youthful amusements as he noticed with increasing interest the attention he received from teenage girls.  Recognizing Hugh’s enthusiasm for fishing, Dad attempted to dissuade (or at least delay) his entrance into the world of women.  Told that he’d have to give up his fishing pole when he got his first girlfriend, Hugh straightway went to the garage returning with his pole outstretched for Dad to receive.  As stated, Hugh was very popular in high school.  Such popularity presented him with opportunities and challenges.  Not prone to conflict of any kind, Hugh would not, however, back away from what he thought was right.  On one particular occasion, I was in Algebra as a sophomore when a great commotion was heard from the hallway prior to class beginning.  Observers rushed to see, returning to tell me that a fight had taken place and one of the participant’s was my older brother.  Upon arriving home, I discovered that Hugh’d taken umbrage at a fellow’s disparagement of his girlfriend and Hugh’d ‘knocked his lights out’.  However, in the fracas he’d received a broken nose.  A week or two with a bandaged nose left a lasting impression - to my knowledge Hugh never fought again.  One of my favorite things about Hugh was how he could make our mother laugh.  Every now and then he’d interject a phrase or anecdote into a conversation that would cause mom to catch her words and erupt in surprise and laughter as Hugh silently basked in his power to lighten her life.  Hugh often did this with others.  One of the great joys we all shared was making a brother or sister laugh so hard that food came out their nose.

During our teen years Dad supported the family as a land surveyor; and we older boys were often pressed into service as his crew members.  During hot, dry, dusty days, Hugh readily learned to handle the transit and the accompanying responsibility of locating each corner and hub of the houses, lots and streets we positioned - a profound responsibility for one so young.  Nevertheless, this responsibility did not dissuade our youthful exuberance and within seconds of stopping the crew car, Hugh would be throwing rocks at the nearest ditch, post, sign, cat or sibling.  Observing his youthful crew, dad used to explain to other men regarding our combined utility that “one boy’s a boy, two boy’s is half a boy, and three boy’s is no boy at all”.

It’s been stated that brothers are like streetlights along the road, they don’t make distance any shorter but they light up the path and make the walk worthwhile.  In this way, Hugh was the hub of our youthful exuberance and the foreordained leader of his brethren.  Exemplifying priesthood practice, Hugh led as we observed him - as a deacon passing sacrament in Clearfield; as a priest blessing the sacrament in Sunset, as an elder commencing a mission in Montana.  I doubt that Hugh ever realized the profound influence he initiated with his brothers as he engaged his mission to New York and New Jersey.  Following a journey from our home in Great Falls, Dad and the boys joined with Mom & Tammy who’d arrived earlier and attended the final hours of Hugh’s preliminaries prior to his flight.  In those days new missionaries gathered in the Tabernacle to express their testimony prior to leaving.  Two years behind him, Jay and I observed with interest the proceedings and reflected on our preparations to go.  Hugh displayed great tree rings of spiritual growth as we listened to his testimony and spoke to him.  He left a significant impression on all of us who’d follow the imprint of his footsteps as our calls arrived.  This is not to suggest that all was soberness.  In fact, one of our favorite pastimes during his absence was to receive one of Hugh’s letters and collectively attempt to decipher his scribbling’s, spellings and punctuation.  Laughter would erupt as one of us would finally discern his intended message and compare what was written to what was intended.  His deplorable handwriting and spelling insinuated his profession in medicine.

I had a brief but exciting few months with Hugh between his return and my leaving.  During this time, Hugh obtained work as an orderly at a mental health facility where he was exposed to many of the severe disorders inmates suffered there.  He didn’t talk much about his experience’s there, only to say that they were severe; and contrasted starkly with his mission experience.  Hugh, rather, chose to focus on the activity and adventure available to him now.  With Jay already serving his mission, Hugh’s persuasive powers were unleashed on me with full force.  And while I didn’t climb any trees for him to chop down, he did persuade me to – river raft in a glacier fed river, eat raw trout without cleaning them, and race at 110 mph on back roads.  Given his persuasiveness and energy, I was grateful to commence my mission far away in the safety of the British Isles.